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    10,640 english joke 300 words jobs found, pricing in GBP

    I need someone to alter some images.

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    As a junior congress person you have been asked to help promote a bill to allow casino gambling in your state. There is much opposition to this bill. Using distributive bargaining, discuss the pros and cons which might arise toward the passing or defeating of this bill. In a hostage crises, is it ethical for a government to agree to grant a terrorist immunity if he releases the hostages, even tho...

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    We are Arinobu Tea, a growing craft tea brand from Japan. Our mission is to deliver “rich moments,” which includes, appreciation of high-quality craft tea and enjoying tea in a peaceful manner to unwind and rejuvenate. Below is our brand story. Steeped in tradition, Arinobu began blending tea in 1863. We stay true to the oriental doctor’s passion for uncompromising quality and co...

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    We're looking for an experienced translator with good skills in translation (including student). OPTIONAL : In your proposal, p...translator with good skills in translation (including student). OPTIONAL : In your proposal, please share a brief summary of your experience, including examples of relevant English to Ukrainian, Serbiab translation work

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    ----> I am searching for a write who will constantly writes articles for my blog. I want to have 4 x per month blog post at a rate of 10€ - 15€ <------- I am running a affiliate eCommerce website offering Xiaomi products, coupons and cash back [login to view URL] I also started a blog, but don&#039;t have enough time to write articles. My plan is to have a blog post every wee...

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    need writer for onsite content $5 per 300 words in perfect english grammar. subjects could be adult related blogs

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    I am looking for someone to edit the excel export file I have of all my products. I am looking for POPULAR Keywords in the product titles, handle, meta descriptions, and tags to increase sales. I have the file and you can just research and change all the info and save in the same document. This file consist of 299 items. I need the product titles and "handle" to be short but strong.

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    As a junior congress person you have been asked to help promote a bill to allow casino gambling in your state. There is much opposition to this bill. Using distributive bargaining, discuss the pros and cons which might arise toward the passing or defeating of this bill.

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    ...MUST be able to deliver finished video within 24 hours of receiving link to files. 3. MUST have fast internet, Download + Upload speeds of at least 15Mb 4. MUST speak English VERY well 5. MUST have a good sense of HUMOUR and the ability to use Editing to make parts funny/funnier! 6. MUST have common sense and the 7. MUST know how to cut down

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    Trophy icon Custom Game of Thrones style Sigil! 20 hours left

    ...Details: ->The polar bear sigil described above should be used in the middle ->The house name should be "HOUSE TOBAL" ->The house motto should be "BRING ME PIE" (this is an inside joke) What I Need: ->A file with just the sigil in vector*, .psd and .jpeg (very high quality) format ->A file with the poster in vector*, .psd and jpeg (very high quality) ...

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    I need some changes to an existing website. I need you to build my online store.

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    hello, I have a data entry project of 300 pages which I want to convert it from excel to word

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    I want to appoint a permanent VA for my 300 pages every month which has to be delivered to me in 15 days. See the sample below. NOTE: You will work in my system. i will give you the system remote access. I have 300 pages to be typed in a specific software installed in my computer. Can you do the typing work for me? If yes I will send you one sample

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    Require someone to write 300 words for a copyrighting exercise we have.

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    ...Duration of briefing should be between 15-30mins (exclude demo). - Every slides should include a script for the presenter (me). Bonus to have make it fun and include a bit of joke... i will try to read it word for word.... Content should focus on: 1) Quick intro to Cyber Security - Cyber threat landscape, wars are shifting towards cyber (eg. reason

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    I need you to critically analyse and edit my research paped. grammar mjstakes and reference style changes please write a short response of 200-500 words for the same.

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    I need video which is funny you can use 3d or 2d animation to create a short video. I want it to include a clean joke like advertising for a store saying all the negative things about the store like buy one get one less offer, think about the store before yourself or an airline which says we have 0 percent success rate. Ride us and never come back

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    I need everyday 5-10 articles. Each article has 300-500 words I need it within 1 hours. The project won't acceptable after the deadline. The project will be ongoing for 4 months and it will be Monday to Saturday. Thanks

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    We need to migrate 300 products from a website using WebsiteBaker CMS to a new WordPress based website.

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    ...2. MUST be able to deliver finished video within 24 hours of receiving link to files. 3. MUST have fast internet, Download + Upload speeds of at least 15Mb 4. MUST speak English VERY well 5. MUST know how to cut down raw footage to a nice fast paced video (no dead space, long pauses or repetitive/boring parts) 6. MUST reply within a few hours of receiving

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    I need a graphic artist / illustrator to join my growing team. You'll be working 12 hours a day, 6 days a week. Pay $300 per month. Requirements: 1. Needs to be fast. I need designs done quickly and well. 2. Needs to be able to work on their own (I WON'T BE TELLING YOU HOW TO MAKE THINGS LOOK GREAT. I AM NOT A DESIGNER. THAT'S YOUR JOB.) 3

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    ...2. MUST be able to deliver finished video within 24 hours of receiving link to files. 3. MUST have fast internet, Download + Upload speeds of at least 15Mb 4. MUST speak English VERY well 5. MUST know how to cut down raw footage to a nice fast paced video (no dead space, long pauses or repetitive/boring parts) 6. MUST reply within a few hours of receiving

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    Making a task repeat itself 300 times a second without lag C++ Source can be included - message me

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    Hi, I need someone who can produce high-quality articles. Your articles must be informative, 100% unique and free of any grammatical errors and proofread the article ...and proofread the article before sending it to me. Instructions ● For each paragraph, Try to backup the reason each item is in the article with facts. ● Conclusion of 50-75 words

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    1]I have designs ready in 72 dpi with layered [login to view URL] will be provided. 2] I just want these designs to be converted to high resolution 300 dpi format. Size i shall provide 3] Final output to be FLATTERN PSD/PDF/JPEG

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    I need some artwork d...(standard font set). I have the logos that need to go on the design already made. Examples of such back patches can be found online easily. The second patch design is kind of a joke design for a team member of mine in brazilian jiu jitsu. Basically I want a design of a squirrel in a kimono with "Squirrel BJJ" on the design.

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    Hi, I'm Richard I'm a part blogger looking for a one-off blog post writer. I...Worded blog post on the benefits of content locking, and how you can easily and effortlessly make $100-$300 per day with content locking using free social media traffic. I would like the headline of the blog to be... "How to make $100-$300 with content locking"

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    Hi Will need scrap arround 400 product from a website. Same person need add those products and pictures with all data scarped on our website. will also need create categories and all need be same scraped website ( product description, images, categories...) The budget is 100USD Thanks

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    i want create joke video for my app

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    [login to view URL] the brush/pencil/shape tool to create a graphic for your logo [login to view URL] creative; experiment with different brush strokes [login to view URL] applying different effects to your text Please select a company from the options below and create a logo for that company Nature’s Healing Spa Relaxing getaway in the country

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    I need an ad for my ebook. The size is 300 x 250 pixels. What I already have is the ebook cover (first pic). Also, I have an image (pls. cut a part out) that could possibly work as an background (2nd pic). At least it must be added some text: "99 Cent statt 3,99 €" (big) "NUR FÜR KURZE ZEIT" (small, vertical)

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    Add 900 products on prestashop. We can do 300 to first phase. Please tell me how long it will take to do the first 300 and also how long to reach 900. I need the first 300 as urgency. Budget: $127

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    1st EA: What needs to be done: (1) Check if the functionality of look at bull's lows only and look at bear's high only is...plus if a freelancer is capable of communicating VOIP on freelance's website or any free voice apps such as Skype,faceebok, gmail, or whatsapp. "I'm broke and it aint no joke," with only $60 as a budget for this project.

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    i would like someone to write me content for about us page (300-500 words). i need it now. content is very simple. i will pay 600.

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    Trophy icon Build a logo Ended

    I need a logo for an annual camping trip that me and my buddies go on every year. As a joke, we loosely refer to ourselves as "The Firm" and the annual camping trip as "The Offsite". This year, the trip is to Asulkan Hut. Attached are two very amateur logos I made using Squarespace software ****** Update: I would like a Sasquatch featured, wearing

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    hi we need someone to put 300 links in one shopify site . thank u

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    that's not a joke. i'm a newcomer to python programming and need help structuring it for my project. the script works fine, but the execution of the programming structure is weak. the task is to insert classes and functions and to implement common software development standards. The goal is to simplify the further development for future projects

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    ...let me know if you have any query. I need the php script which can convert the html to pdf file as per the print specification. must meet adobe ICC print standard. CMYK and 300 DPI. Html generated dynamically from database. so the script must handle any html to convert into pdf. html page source code and all assets are given here, we can provide PSD

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    I am on Microsoft Visio 2010. I need a module written to sort all of the sheets in my workbook alphabetically. There are over 300 sheets. The data is sensitive so I can't send the workbook. I'm sure it's easy for someone in the know, I found a guide online but couldn't get it working. [login to view URL]

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    We need someone to assist with uploading pictures and product descriptions (and product tags) into a new online store. There will be about 200-300unique products to upload. We will need this done within 3-5 business days so high speed internet will be essential. The online store is a web template on Wix so experience using WIX is a major plus.

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    We have setup 300 GMB locations over the past week for our Pest Control business through MBV - [login to view URL] Our company delivers a wide range of pest control services across the New York area. We want to optimize each of these new listings for the main services we offer. We are looking for an agency or high level solution

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    $30 Resize 5 of my images so I can print it to 45 inches x 65 inches at 150 dpi and 300 dpi. The files must be able to print at any size. No mirroring needed. Send to me as a jpg. Send all source files. You must be an expert at this. PS might be able to do it. You must be able to tell me what resolution it is. I need it done in 1 day. I own the copyright

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    The project involves writing 10 articles over a span of 5 days; two articles have to be submitted every day. The topic would involve writing about second passport citizenship, essentially through investment. The material will be provided for the same as well. The article should be SEO friendly and contain relevant keywords too. Title and content will all be done by the person hired.

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    Trophy icon logo for snowmobile club Ended

    Im in search of a logo for our parody snowmobile club. Our club is...logo I would like Meadow Mulisha and Steamboat springs, Co above and below or around the logo . I would like a image of a snowmobile making a turn in a meadow. This is a fun joke club so I would like the logo to be a bit cheesy. colors im thinking just black and white for the image .

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    Trophy icon A simple GIF image Ended

    What is needed is an animated GIF showing a female figure of "Death" in a red cloth. The figure is "moving" (i.e. levitating)and cutting off (male huma...face and should reach about 10 centimeters (if real-height) under her shoulders. [Yes I do realize that this definition is very very vague] That's just about it. This is a joke-gift for a friend.

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    I need an online dynamic web form that allows for graphical representation of an ownership structure of a corporation. It should include the following entity types Individual Trust Company The nodes should be entities and the edges should represent percentage ownership. Examples are attached in the word document. It should be beautiful and easy to add/subtract nodes. Finally, once the...

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    ...people who are going to "try it out". No dabblers allowed here. You must be open to getting trained on exactly how our systems and processes work. MUST like having fun and can joke and laugh with the business owers To begin, you must be willing to put a minimum of two hours a day (most work at least 5 hours a day) in on every single weekday. This is a

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    Need someone to help with creating written content for our social media accounts 2-3 times per day on IG and FB, each post needs to be between 200-300 words

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    Painter or Digital Painter needed to produce a 2ftx3ft 300 dpi painting in African style

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